if you feel alone in this
everyone around you keeps telling you to use another tip or trick. you're ready for something deeper.
your friends are still swapping scripts. someone suggests another sticker chart, another book, another appointment.
the people who love you tell you you're overthinking it. so you nod along, because you can't quite put words to what you're feeling. you just know it isn't about the strategy anymore.
the tantrum after you hold a boundary isn't the hardest part. the fear underneath is, what does this mean about me as a mom?
where i've been
i was really good at controlling the moment. i was missing the relationship.
i've spent ten years with toddlers and their moms. in the beginning, when a toddler melted down, i felt confused, helpless, and alone. i felt like i wasn't a good enough grown up for them, and i just didn't know what to do differently.
i knew i wanted to do things differently from what i had seen growing up, but i didn't know a better way. so i was spiraling all the time, thinking, this can't be the way that it ends. this is not the kind of grown up that i want to be.
for a long time, i thought boundaries would make everything feel fixed. if i was consistent enough, i'd always know what to do.
six years in, i realized i was really good at controlling the moment, and i was missing the relationship.
it took me a long time to learn how to see toddlerhood. boundaries aren't about control. they're about who your child is becoming. sharing power. showing them what's normal between the two of you.
that changed everything about how i live with toddlers. strategies plus relationship is what i want to teach you.
inside the course
an opening and four modules. tantrums, boundaries, and behavior woven through every one.
each module walks through tantrums and meltdowns, boundaries, and changing a behavior, with stories from my ten years with toddlers and their moms, with myths that help us understand what's happening, and with the language of emotions and learning to work with them, not pushing back against them.
you'll learn to see into each moment, like what big feelings really are underneath a tantrum. and it's a safe container for you to do your own emotional work.
i'm not giving you a script. i'm teaching you how to see it. you'll have strategies to hold in your back pocket, but you choose when you use them, how you use them, and what your home needs right now. you already have that dignity and that power. you just need to see it for yourself.
opening
the grown up in the room
who the grown up in the room is, and why your toddler needs one.
- what it looks, sounds, and feels like
- what child development research tells us toddlers need
module 1
you
what comes up for you in the hard moments.
- the yelling mom and the giving-in mom, and why both make sense
- the anger underneath, and what else you can do with it
- why boundaries are so hard when you can't say no
module 2
your toddler
what toddlerhood feels like from their side.
- how your toddler experiences big feelings
- why boundaries are hard for toddlers too, and why they need them right now
- how much more they get to enjoy toddlerhood with a grown up in the room
- why the hell they act like that
module 3
the moment
the middle of the tantrum, and what it looks and sounds like to set a boundary and actually hold it, where you don't feel harsh, but you know you're not giving in too much either.
- what to do in the middle of a meltdown
- the monsters of toddlerhood: how to meet them when they show up, and keep the day moving
- what an emotionally healthy boundary sounds like
- what happens between you two when you hold it well
module 4
after
repair, the replay at night, and what to do when it comes back.
- how to come down from a hard moment with your toddler
- repair after you yell or give in
- getting out of the replay at night
- when the behavior comes back
plus · the village
free access to the village: AMAs (ask me anythings) with kimber, and a space to meet like-minded moms, talk about the hard stuff, share your wins, and trade strategies. it's also where the back pocket strategy library is, which has really specific strategies for moments in tantrums, meltdowns, boundaries, and changing a behavior.
plus · the nightly workbook
what went well? what did i learn? what needs to change tomorrow? not in a perfectionistic, anxious way. it's how you learn about yourself and move out of shame and perfectionism into willingness to do the hard sh*t.
what changes
you see the moment differently.
you see your toddler differently. you see yourself differently. you start choosing from your values instead of reacting.
it's about the relationship, their developmental needs, your nervous system capacity, and learning how to be the grown up in the room.
you get the relationship with your toddler you've been craving. the secret no one tells you is boundaries.
questions
who is this for?
toddler moms, especially with a late two, three, or four year old, who've read the books and tried the scripts and still feel like something is missing.
is it self-paced?
yes. you can go through it in order, or go right to what's happening in your home right now.
are there scripts?
no. you'll get strategies and know why i choose them. but our goal is that you learn to see the moment for yourself and decide what your family needs.
how is this different from big feelings?
big feelings is free, and it helps you start understanding what's going on. the grown up in the room is where you learn to see toddlerhood differently and become the mom your toddler can lean on.
how long do i have access?
forever. come back to it every time your toddler gets into a new stage.
is there a payment plan?
yes, of course. i want every mom who wants this to be able to get into it.